Guye de Mann

You can't handle his girth.

• Connecting to server...
• Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
• You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
• Stranger: Hey babe
• You: oh hey dear
• Stranger: asl?
• You: how was work?
• Stranger: tiring
• You: uhhhhh yeah me 2
• Stranger: damn ash ketchum
• Stranger: alwasy beating me in battles
• Stranger: "Gary Oak, you suck!"
• Stranger: I hate him so much.
• You: I know Gary... I just can't handle your girth.
• Stranger: Wish I could just hire someone to kill him.
• Stranger: My girth is a lot
• Stranger: I know.
• Stranger: Maybe I should roleplay with Ash
• Stranger: act like I'm misty
• Stranger: and then have him get into the springs
• Stranger: get behind him
• You: Then you should take off your fake breasts.
• Stranger: take off my fake breasts
• Stranger: the unleash my girth
• Stranger: into surprise buttsex
• Stranger: Yes....
• You: I think so.
• Stranger: That's what I'll do.
• You: I can see it now
• Stranger: Are you alright with that May?
• You: "I'm GARY OAK POKEMON MASTER! You can't handle my girth!"
• You: Its okay Gary.
• Stranger: Oh yes!
• Stranger: I'll say that.
• You: We'll have some hard core sex when you get back.
• Stranger: Thanks
• Stranger: I can't handle giving buttsex too long
• Stranger: makes me feel like I'm gay instead of a rapisty
• Stranger: rapist*
• You: It is such a valid point.
• Stranger: excuse my spelling
• You: I mean... I don't want to fuck a gay man.
• You: Soo.... it better be rape.
• Stranger: I heard they're 2x worse
• Stranger: cause they always want ass
• Stranger: scared of the vaj...
• You: Pretty much... and my vaj gets so lonely.
• Stranger: Don't worry
• Stranger: It won't be lonely tonight
• Stranger: Well I'm off
• Stranger: *grabs fake breasts and hair tie*
• You: Well... my ditto will keep me company then.
• You: Here, take these shorts too.
• You: She likes to wear them.
• Stranger: *puts on shorts*
• Stranger: hmm
• Stranger: thong?
• Stranger: or grannie panties?
• You: Nah.
• You: Grannie panties.
• Stranger: Alright
• Stranger: Time to go rape ash.
• You: Do it.
• Stranger: Call him up
• You: Tell me all about it.
• Stranger: tell him I want to meet him at the springs
• Stranger: tell him I'm misty
• Stranger: Alright
• Stranger: *Leaves House*
• Stranger: Bye May!
• You: /calls ash- meet misty at the springs... she has something she wants to ask you./
• Stranger: *Comes back 5 1/2 hours later*
• You: baaii my pokemon master!
• Stranger: HOLY SHIT
• Stranger: HOLY SHIIIIT
• Stranger: OMG
• Stranger: OMG OMG OMG
• You: you are gay aren't you.
• Stranger: PLEASE
• You: Damn it!
• You: DAMN YOU ASHHHH!!!
• Stranger: SCREW ME RIGHT NOW
• Stranger: DO IT!
• Stranger: *Does it up all night long*
• You: /proceeds to screw/
• Stranger: *wakes up next morning*
• Stranger: Phew...
• Stranger: That was a close call
• You: wheewww.
• You: Near miss there.
• Stranger: shit
• Stranger: so close
• Stranger: I say we just kill ash
• Stranger: *calls up oak*
• You: He liked it didn't he?
• Stranger: ''Ya, I need you to put poison in Ash's orange juice*
• Stranger: Oh jeez
• Stranger: *hangs up*
• Stranger: Oak is on it
• Stranger: And yea
• Stranger: he was enjoying it so much
• Stranger: he didn't say anything
• Stranger: until I was done
• Stranger: he went in for the kiss
• Stranger: that's when I slapped him and ran...
• You: Did you bitch slap him dear?
• Stranger: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN
• Stranger: Sprinted is better
• Stranger: screw the car, he'd get to me in time
• Stranger: I had to sprint
• You: Whew... good thing we gave you your running shoes.
• You: Only had to hold down b.
• Stranger: *5 hours later*
• Stranger: *RING RING RING RING*
• Stranger: *picks up phone*
• Stranger: *Oak...? OAK???*
• Stranger: ''This is ash bitch, I'm coming to get you"
• You: I'll get my rayquaza
• Stranger: ''I killed Oak, With my penis down his throat, choked him to death"
• Stranger: NO
• Stranger: This is a job...
• Stranger: For...
• Stranger: MUDKIPZ!
• Stranger: I know he hates me
• Stranger: BUT ITS THE ONLY WAY
• You: Surf should do it.
• You: Always does.
• Stranger: You can't control mudkipz
• Stranger: ....
• Stranger: Mudkipz is the only pokemon out there
• Stranger: that has a taste for human flesh
• Stranger: and wants mroe.
• Stranger: I'm gonna have to keep him in a cage until I meet ash
• You: I once was turned into a mudkip by a wizard... it was y.
• Stranger: oh no
• Stranger: Good thing I found you
• Stranger: But your sister...
• Stranger: It was too late for her.
• Stranger: *sobs*
• You: I knoww... but you tried dear.
• You: You tried.
• Stranger: Well
• Stranger: your sister is gonna have one helluva job now
• You: She'll do just fine.
• You: If you don't let her see you first.
• You: ...
• You: Srsly.
• Stranger: Don't worry
• Stranger: It's a one sided cage
• You: Don't let her see you first.
• Stranger: I'll point it at ash
• You: Gooodd.
• You: Get a string to open it.
• Stranger: I'll tazer her while she's tearing through his flesh
• Stranger: and then recapture her
• You: Be careful love.
• Stranger: This is gonna be scary.
• Stranger: *Confronts ash*
• Stranger: BISH BETTER WATCH OUT.
• Stranger: *coughbeashcough*
• Stranger: *COUGH BE ASH COUGH*
• You: you are going to pay for what you tried Gary.
• You: You tried to poison my juice?
• You: MAHHHH JUICE?!?!?
• Stranger: YAH, YOURE APPLE JUICE TOO
• You: I LOVE MY JUICEEE!!!
• You: BITCH FUCKER!
• Stranger: BRING IT ON
• You: PIKACHU THUNDERBOLT!
• Stranger: CHARIZARD, I CHOOSE YOU!
• Stranger: FIRE BALL@!
• Stranger: *charizard dies*
• Stranger: FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
• Stranger: CHARIZARD! NO!
• You: PIKACHU use Agility!
• Stranger: YOU BETTER WATCH OUT BISH
• Stranger: *realses mudkipz, facing pikachu and ash*
• Stranger: *GETS TAZER READY*
• You: /pikachu tries to escape but is ripped to shreds by the resistance to lightning and its ferocious claws.
• Stranger: *thinks to self, 'HOLY SHIT, LOOK AT THAT MUDKIPZ GOOOO'*
• You: OH GOD NOOOO PIKACHU!!!!
• You: /is suffocated by the torrent of water unleashed down his throat from the mudkip's vagina.
• You: /dies
• Stranger: *tazers mudkips*
• Stranger: *Recaptures*
• Stranger: IT
• Stranger: IS
• Stranger: FINISHED
• You: /mudkips breaks freeeeeeeeee
• Stranger: SHIT SHIT SHIT!
• Stranger: *EVOLVES*
• You: ... sorry mate.
• Stranger: WTF, IM NOT A POKEMON, I DDONT EVOLVE!
• Stranger: *Turns into swampart*
• Stranger: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAWR!
• Stranger: *kills the universe*
• Stranger: *everyone dies*
• Stranger: BUH BYE NAOW!